SOCIAL MEDIA

Sunday, 29 July 2018

The Little Moments



Trigger warning: suicidal thoughts

I am writing this on my 3 and a half hour journey home from Portsmouth after the #MHBlogAwards. Recently I have found myself lost in a fog of anxiety, self-harm, and suicidal thoughts. A scary place to be when it feels like the force of those thoughts get stronger and you may be fighting a losing battle. The majority of my days, whilst I function normally, are filled with constant worry and a brain that seems to constantly whisper that suicide is the answer. It is draining fighting the thoughts and pretending that everything is ok. Sometimes, however, I get little moments of rest bite. Days where talking isn't too difficult, where my brain has the space to think of other things, where I don't feel constantly on the edge of a panic attack and where my cheeks actually ache from smiling. 

Thursday, 7 June 2018

Relapse




Trigger warning, self harm. 

Since August I have been plunged into a relapse. Anxiety, emetophobia, depression and self-harm all coming to have a go at me. Holding me prisoner. 

Sunday, 13 May 2018

Mental illness; the ugly truth



With Mental Health Awareness week beginning tomorrow, I wanted to do a mental health post depicting the ugly truths of living with these debilitating illnesses. Far too often in tv shows and movies, we see a romanticised version of what it's like to suffer from mental illness. So I wanted this post to be brutally honest, so it does come with a trigger warning. Living with a mental illness is horrible and as it is an invisible illness, those who don't suffer struggle to understand. So I took to Twitter and asked people to tell me what it is like living with their illness, here is their story, here is their ugly truth.  

Wednesday, 27 December 2017

A new year's letter to you




Dear you. 

The you who is ready to face the year head on and is raring to go. The you who is rolling into the new year indifferent. The you who looks at the 365 days ahead and wonders how you can possibly see the 1st of January 2019. This letter is for you.

Sunday, 8 October 2017

A letter to the healthier me


To a healthier me,

There are many old versions of myself that I could address this letter to, some versions were worse off, others better off but this letter is to myself last year, to a healthier, better version of myself.
Wednesday, 20 September 2017

Vulnerability is okay



Vulnerability is something that growing up we are told is a sign of weakness. So we all go through life trying to appear as okay as possible. But sometimes, that act is too hard to keep up and so the walls we have built come crashing down and left to the world is a vulnerable, small, and often frightened self. This is what happened to me two weeks ago. 

Thursday, 1 September 2016

Anxiety In All Its Glory



When reading about anxiety we all told the same things; the heart palpitations, sweating and the difficulty concentrating but I thought in this post I would explain the side effects that I have experienced through my battle with generalised anxiety that are not discussed all that often.

Tuesday, 29 September 2015

Barely Breathing

Hey my names Alex. I'm 16 years old and I live in the UK. When I was around the age of 12 I realised I wasn't like everyone else...

Wednesday, 16 September 2015

Mental Health and Social Media

So I was scrolling through my Instagram feed and came across a post that related  to self-harm. This then sparked the question in me: is social media a good or bad development for mental health issues. So I did some research, typing in self harm (With a slight change to the spelling, as Instagram doesn't allow the hashtag self harm however to not trigger anyone I will not write the exact spelling I used.) into the search bar of Instagram and I was shocked at what I found. A whole community of people posting (at times) very graphic photos of their self harm. What shocked me most when I clicked onto one of the profiles was that it was the account of a 13 year old girl. Somebody who could be self harming for a number of reasons but choose to join the community that found itself online, gaining likes for her destructive behaviour.


Sunday, 6 September 2015

An anxious child

I was always an anxious child, I always seemed to see things from the dangerous perspective and I grew irrational fears of things.  Fears that would lead me to avoid certain situations completely; sleepovers, the cinema, theme parks, phone conversations unless I had a script in front of me or anywhere where anyone could be ill (school during the times where there were plenty of illnesses going around were hell). A lot of these fears I would hide from people because  I was scared they would judge me on having such a limited life.  I truly believed I would grow out of this.