Friday, 21 July 2017

What if there was no tomorrow?

This post contains spoilers for the Netflix Original film Before I Fall and comes with a trigger warning as I will be touching upon the topic of suicide. 

What if there was no tomorrow and all you had was today? This is the idea behind the Neflix Original film 'Before I Fall'. A film that recounts the last day of Samantha's life, a teenager who seems to have the so called perfect life; a family that is well off, popularity, a boyfriend, a group of friends and a promising future. However, that evening she dies in a car accident only to find that the next morning she wakes up to have to repeat the day she died again, and again and again. In the process of redoing her last day of life she learns about herself and those she chooses to surround herself with. But more importantly she learns about how her actions have the power to impact other people's actions. So whilst she cannot change her fate, either way she will die at the end of the day, she can change the fate of those around her. Most importantly she can change the fate of Juliet. A fellow classmate who has been bullied by Samantha and her group of friends for years and who on this particular evening takes her life. When the screen went black and the credits were rolling I was left with a heaviness in my chest and the plot stayed with me for quite a while afterwards. So much so that I feel the need to talk about it. 

 About 4 years ago whilst driving me to school my mum asked me "if you were to die tomorrow, would you be happy with your time on this earth?" I remained silent but internally I answered no. That question has stuck with me ever since and this film made me think of that because what if there was no tomorrow? We all have a certain amount of tomorrows, could be 500, could be 6000, just like it could be 2. We just don't know. We have found a comfort in this uncertainty, a blissful ignorance, and so we take this uncertainty and believe that we have an infinite number of tomorrows. We get caught up in things that don't matter, our priorities are in the wrong place and we hold grudges because there is always another day to resolve things. But what if there wasn't? What if today was all you could have? Imagine how much nicer we would be to each other, how we would live in the moment and not live our lives through a screen. Imagine how precious every moment would be to us. Think of all the tomorrows that have passed into yesterdays and turned into a muggy haze, seconds and minutes passed that we don't remember. 

Before writing this post I sat watching the clouds move through the sky. I really made sure to breathe and to take in the moment and whilst doing this I asked myself again mums question. This time I answered that yes, if tonight was my last night on this planet, I could rest peacefully. That I had had a good 20 years. I have laughed, I have travelled a bit, I have had some amazing adventures, and I have touched peoples lives. For me, knowing this blog has helped people and maybe saved a few too makes my life mission complete. Of course there is plenty more I would like to do but if my timer ran out tonight and I wasn't granted any more tomorrows, I would know I did my best and I did well. 

The other important point of this film that I want to discuss is the message that suicide can be avoided, that ones actions can make a difference. Samantha is left redoing this day of her life until she realises that the reason she is being made to redo this is to save Juliet.Which in turn saves Samantha from the hell of replaying the same day and instead allowing her to sleep peacefully. Simply by taking the time to talk to Juliet, Samantha makes a huge difference to Juliet's outcome. Unfortunately we still live in a society where whilst we recognise suicide as a tragic action, if we look realistically into what is done to help those who are at crisis point, the answer for many situations is not much. When someone asks how someone else is they don't want the raw, uncomfortable, deep answer because as humans we don't like those emotions. But talking about those emotions could save a life. 

As I come to the end of this post i'm not quite sure why I wrote it or what the point of it is but I guess I would like you to take this away with you. If there was no tomorrow, what would you regret? What would you want to change? Would you be happy with your time on this earth? 

You never know when your last today is and when you have run out of tomorrows. So make each one count. Treat people well, do what you love, and make a difference to other peoples lives. 



  1. Such a thoughtful post. I think it's really important for people to identify their core values, and evaluate regularly if they're living those values. That, in my opinion, is a way to be okay with every day being our last. (Agh that's so morbid! But you get my point.)

    - Shannon |

  2. Hi, very thought provoking post. Tbh I'm still thinking what my answer would be to your mums question. On the suicide bit, I have some friends who I can openly talk to about my suicidal thoughts and feelings, without any of them screaming, running away or calling 999. I think these conversations are so important in understanding that just because I have these thoughts doesn't mean I'm making a plan. And talking helps so much. Hope this makes sense